I thought almost everybody wanted to be known as a nice person until I met a coworker of mine some years ago. Let’s call her Amber. Amber calmly stated that she did not want to be a nice person at all. She had tried being kind and people either took advantage of her or were very mean to her. So, she decided that it was not worth it. She actually felt that it was better to keep her dukes up and always be ready and rocking on go.
Wow. I was amazed at such an honest admission. But after some time and life experience I now understand why Amber made this statement. Just look at the news and count the news articles, blogs, and websites on bullying – people who are purposely mean to people who they think they can dominate over. Oh, I am not saying that Amber was right. Why become this angry person with a hair-trigger temperament? Why allow others to dictate what you become?
This article is not for those of us that have decided we will be the kind, reasonable and sound individuals we were meant to be. This article is for those who may or may not realize that they have caused a domino effect as described by Amber earlier – people who are mean to others may cause others to decide to become mean as a defense.
Ask yourself if you find yourself constantly and consistently doing the following things. If you do, then you may be a mean girl if:
- Do you use sulking, sarcasm and ignoring people to get your way or punish people?
- Do you understand that bullying is the emotional equivalent of physical violence?
- Are you a manager, supervisor or head of your household? People in lead positions are the ones most likely to abuse their authority.
- Do you feel like you have to blame others for your difficulties?
- Are you relatively a happy person? Or are you unhappy about major aspects of your life?
If you really can’t tell, then ask somebody whom you can trust and is not a kiss-butt. This means someone that will really tell you the truth about who you are and how you act.